Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Oh dear.... why would I even think this!!!!!!!!!!

Well after some depressive thinking..... I think maybe I should have been a stupid girl, a stupid whore.... they seem pretty happy to me (beside them getting pregnant). Maybe if I were a stupid girl.... things would just be different. I'm wondering what my life would be like if I were a stupid girl. Actually I feel pretty stupid for even thinking this. When I thought about it earlier it seemed like a nice thought but now seeing it typed out it seems extemely stupid.
This is just really hard. I feel so lonely and sad, yet I'm happy / fine all at the same time. It's werid. Being here just really makes me realize how alone I could actually be....( but it's not like I don't say that in every other blog). I was thinking about Josh Gibson today... where is he? how is he? what happened to him? He just dropped off the face of the earth. And Josh Nessmiller crosses my mind everytime I can't sleep.... I miss talking to him all night until time to go to school or until we fell asleep. oh dear.... I don't even know the point of this blog.....

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home