wow
so after realizing. your life can change in a matter of seconds.
things are hard to deal with.
like what if i had been in a wreck?
what i had gotten a ticket?
i find myself so thankful for what i have now.
but at the same time
i feel like a horrible person. i have pushed away everyone who has truely cared about me.
i'm a horrible family member.
i'm mean, rude, and selfish when it comes to my family.
it's easy to see that the only person that cares about your feelings is you, & to have pushed away those who care most, those who need you...
it's hard to deal with.
i found myself sad with what i have accomplished. i haven't done enough with my life to feel ok to die.
but then again.... if i had have died... what so great was a i leaving behind?
idk. it's kinda hard to deal with.
& what made me so lucky?
why am i so special as to get off free?
what was this a sign of?
why did it happen?
what lesson was i supposed to learn?
posted by pink_blackbutterfly @ 2:37 AM
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